It's not that I haven't admitted to it; it's just that I'm not enjoying my reaction so far to it.
I suspected at 3 weeks; had a dating scan at 6 weeks and am now nearly 10 weeks pregnant. Yeah!
Now... If only I could stop the feelings of apprehension. If only I could stop the dreams. If only I could stop checking for bleeding every hour. If only I could get past the fear and accept that this uncomfortable feeling in my stomach is just pregnancy nerves, bloating and constipation. If only I could let myself enjoy this time of my life.
Is it a matter of letting go of the past? Or is it a matter of embracing what has been to fully appreciate what is now?
*sigh* one day at a time. Looking at old photos helps. I'll make it to this again, I'm sure ...I think.
But either way I already have a greater appreciation of how truly blessed I am. Fear or no fear - that has to be a good thing.
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